The Code

Yes, Gentle Reader, I hab a code.

This means I have a cold in cold code. (Code code?)

That sounds kind of glamourous, actually, like I am in possession of some kind of secret spy/intelligence information that will crack The Secret, instead of just snorting a lot.

I have been saying "Morning" to people at the hotel, but it's been coming out "Boarding".

I can see how this would be especially tricky if one were a flight attendant, and if you said to someone, "Boarding" people would be like ,

"What, Now?" and you'd have to explain,

"Do, Do, I'b sorry. I just meant to say "Good Boarding".

So here come the fancy people with their golf-related carry ons and the tiny animals on their pants (SEE PHOTO) going "Good Boarding? That's us, right? First Clahss?"

And then you'd have to tell them to just hode on to their Blackberries and sit dowd like eberybody else.

Unless they're African-American. I don't think I would tell them to hold on to their Blackberries, as this may be misconstrued in a way that would not be funny until MUCH later.